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10) Collect potatoes. Paint faces on them and give them names. Name one after your roommate. Separate your roommate's potato from the others. Wait a few days, and then bake your roommate's potato and eat it. Explain to your roommate, "He just didn't belong."
9) songesha everything to one side of the room. Ask your roommate if he knows how much an tembo weighs, and look at the floor on the empty side of the room with concern.
8) Draw a tiny black line on your nose. Make it bigger every day. Look at it and say, "The hair, it's growing. Growing!"
7) Buy some knives. Sharpen them every night. While you're doing so, look at your roommate and mutter, "Soon, soon...."
6) Collect hundreds of pens and pile them on one side of the room. Keep one pencil on the other side of the room. Laugh at the pencil.
5) Tell your roommate, "I've got an important message for you." Then pretend to faint. When wewe recover, say wewe can't remember what the message was. Later on, say, "Oh, yeah, I remember!" Pretend to faint again. Keep this up for several weeks.
4) While your roommate is out, glue your shoes to the ceiling. When your roommate walks in, sit on the floor, hold your head, and moan.
3) Make a sandwich. Don't eat it, leave it on the floor. Ignore the sandwich. Wait until your roommate gets rid of it, and then say, "Hey, where the heck is my sandwich!?" Complain loudly that wewe are hungry.
2) Every time your roommate walks in yell, "Hooray! You're back!" as loud as wewe can and dance around the room for five minutes. Afterwards, keep looking at your watch and saying, "Shouldn't wewe be going somewhere?"
1) Talk back to your mchele Krispies. All of a sudden, act offended, throw the bowl on the floor and kick it. Refuse to clean it up, explaining, "No, I want to watch them suffer."
posted by DramaQueen1020
orodha of things I love, and orodha of things I hate.
If anyone agrees wewe can post below. These are all random. ish.

Love
1) Pictures with funny captions.
2) Ice cream.
3) Moustaches.
4) Poison dart frogs :P
5) Cats
6) Cute cats
7) Cute Cats in silly poses.
8) Daffodils
9) Laughing.
10) Kitkats. The candy, yum!
11) Harry Potter
12) Sirius Black
13) Sirius the star.
14) Plaid
15) Queen!!! :)
16) Lemonade
17) Funny rants for no reason
18) Rants that have a reason
19) Unicorns
20) My boyfriend. (jk, don't have one at the moment)
21) Jewelry
22) Peace symbols
22) Theatre games
23) Stupid theatre games
24) Freaky things
25) Ellen...
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posted by kitty190123
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This is really stupid but I was feeling bored...
HOW TO INSTALL SOFTWARE

1. Examine the software packaging until wewe find a little printed box that explains what kind of computer system wewe need to run the software. It should look something like this:

SYSTEM REQUIREMENTS
2386 PROCESSOR au HIGHER
628.8 MEGAHERTZ MODEM
719.7 MB FREE DISK SPACE
3546 MB RAM
432323 MB ROM
05948737 MB RPM ANTILOCK BRAKING SYSTEM

NOTE: This software will not work on your computer.

2. Open the software packaging and remove the manual. This will contain detailed instructions on installing, operating, and troubleshooting the software. Throw it away.

3. Find the actual software,...
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Wanyonya damu From Around the World


By Stephanie Moore

A vampire is a blood-sucking, undead thing of the night that comes after people in their nightmares. Many cultures have vampire myths. In the past, folklore was a means of explaining what people didn’t understand. Widespread vampire mythology reflects the uncertainty about death that we all face.

People in the past had little understanding of the decomposition process.If an exhumed body looked “plump”, how did they know it was the natural result of gases in the body? To them, blood leaking from a corpse’s mouth meant that the dear departed...
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From butterflies to praying everyone was okay.I ran to the back room where Ben was.John ran after me.
I saw Ben pointing a gun at a aunt of John's.I grabbed my shoe and threw it at the gun.It slid out of his hand.John's aunt ran away.Ben starred at me.Then,slowly got out another gun.He kept looking at me with a confused look.I looked at John,then,quivering,I knew I had to do something.
"Blondie,Leave.NOW."Ben demanded.John fled,I hope he was bringing help!"Well,well,well.Nanette.I told I'd get you.You thought I'd lie?"He asked."N-n-n..."I stuttered and just shoke my head.This,wasn't the end!I...
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The most bila mpangilio thing ever made - me and my friend talking on Facebook chat. Brace yourself for an undescribable dose of epicness.

H - Hattress
E - Her Friend Emily

H: Why do wewe call me and not say anything?
Second time in a row?

E: When did I call you?
Probably my sister was playing.

H: That explains a lot.
Many people call me kwa accident because I'm first on their contacts list. (my name starts with a)

E: Was she imba "Hallelujah"?

H: Nope.
There were only some creaks
and kind of a distant scream
I thought that maybe you're being murdered.

E: Because we've got a torture chamber in our basement, but...
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posted by sakurahanazono
1.)When your teacher asks any maswali say "Why does my Cats breath smell like cat food?"

2.) When the teacher is kusoma out facts say "Lies! Lies!" au "Fibs brake baby Jesus' ribs!"

3.) Pretend to cough every time your teacher starts to talk.

4.) Throw your pencil case at the teacher and shout "Go pikachu!"

5.) When your teacher asks why wewe didn't do your homework say " wewe can't tell me off for something I didn't do!"

6.) Jump on juu of the meza, jedwali and shout "Spidey powers activate" while imitating spiderman.

7.) When the teacher asks wewe to answer a swali say "The brain wewe are trying to reach...
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They ran to the mti house.Maybelle was confused,this place was so much bigger.Did it ever end?What?Her land was small."Here!Go in here!I'll go get food!"Sarah said,and ran."Maybelle.How old are you?"Alicia asked."16"She said."DANG IT!GOTTA WAIT 6 YEARS."Henry yelled."Now I ask wewe a question.Does your land...end?"Maybelle asked."Course it does!Yours doesn't?"Alicia asked."Nope!We live forever!Along as Ariana doesn't kill us."Maybelle said."Here!"Sarah said.Running with a bag of Chips,three cans of pop,And a cereal box."This should last wewe the night."Sarah said."You got the Stone?"Sarah asked....
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Sarah couldn't sleep,when she did,she had nightmares!.In her nightmare she was with Maybelle.Running.Thinking that lady would catch us.Then,She popped out of the ground."HA!"She yelled.Sarah ran to the door."MAYBELLE!"Sarah screeched.The lady grew taller,Larger.She soon became a giant.She had Maybelle in her hand."What do wewe want from me,Ariana?"Maybelle asked."What is wrong with you!"I grabbed two sticks and stabbed Ariana."OW!STOP!"Ariana picked me up in her other hand."Ah!"Sarah woke up.She brushed her bangs back.
---------------------------------------------------
The three Marafiki came...
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"Do wewe hear that?"Alicia asked."What?"Henry and Sarah asked."That,that,that sound.It's like."Alicia banged the floor."No.I don't hear anything."Said Sarah."Come here."Alicia said.
They got out.
Alicia beckoned them.
"There!It's getting louder!"
The banging continued.
Alicia found herself in the woods.
She stopped.
Henry and Sarah caught up to her.
Alicia covered her mouth.
"What.Is.I-i-it?"Alicia asked.
Down the steep hill.Was a door the door was buried in the ground.under leaves.
The three Marafiki stepped down.The noise grew louder.Henry and Sarah could hear it now.
Alicia was down first.She saw a keyhole.Alicia looked for the key.
"ALICIA!"Sarah said.
Alicia looked down,stopped her foot from going down,And backed up.A blood puddle.
"Oh my go-"
"The key!It's in the blood!"Henry said.
"Ew!I'm not picking it up!"Alicia said.
Sarah looked around and pushed Henry forward.
Henry picked up the key,And put it in the keyhole...
It was Friday,exactly when Molly got nyumbani she went to bed."UGH!So tired!Stupid school."She alisema laying down."Molly!I need wewe to fill up the fridge with water bottles!"Mom yelled."MOM!I JUST LAID DOWN!"She shouted."I don't care!Now come on!"Mom demanded,even louder."FINE!!!"Molly's voice cut through the air.Molly stomped in there."Here!Get to work!"Mom said,handing Molly a bottle of water."Fine!"Molly alisema watching her mom walk off."Make your bed...Fill up the fridge...Clean the walls."Molly mumbled.Then."Man.Now I want water."Molly picked a bottle and opened the top.But a little spilled,Molly...
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1. Ask people to be your fan. Seriously, if you're gonna do that, wewe might as well tell everybody you're a whore.

2. Troll. If wewe troll, wewe will be banned in 10 sekunde flat and nobody will feel sorry for wewe when wewe whine about your old account being banned.

3. Speak 1337. if u t4lk li3k d3s, nobody will take wewe seriously.

4. Talk trash about Hetalia. I don't like Hetalia, but I don't talk trash about it. The fangirls will rape wewe with hate if wewe say rude things.

5. Be anything like dudelol17.
Taylor:*Wakes up*LIZZIE!*panting*
Lizzie:Taylor!Taylor,Calm down.
Taylor's P.O.V:
I looked around and saw Charm,Amber,Amy,and Lizzie.
Taylor:What?Wait what happened??
Amy:You were outside,Had scratches on your arm,so we drove wewe to the hospital.
I looked at my arm,A scratch ran down my arm,My eyes got huge.
Lizzie:It's okay!You're okay!
Then Amber turned on the TV.
Lady on news:Today Johnathan Jonesmen was arrested for murdering his wife.And today,his 3 daughters are in a orphanage.And his oldest daughter,Taylor is in the hospital.
I started to get dizzy.I almost dozed off when.
Lizzie:Taylor,Here *hand a bracelet*
The Bracelet had five rhinestones, and 5 charms.One had a little girl dancing,The sekunde one was a key,The third one had a moyo lock,The fourth one had a lock,The fifth one had Locket,I opened it up.I saw a picha of Me and Lizzie.
posted by TwilightGirl312
I have seen a lot of cyberbullying before, but it seems to be getting much worse and needs to end. The other siku I was on Youtube when I saw an arguement where one person was clearly bullying the other. I had watched a video that had all these clips from different sinema put together while "Fireflies" kwa Owl City played in the background. After it was over, I looked at the maoni and I was very upset kwa this arguement. I'm not going to give the actual usernames au real names of the people involved, but let's just call them "Annie" and "Jessica". I apologize in advance if you're kusoma this...
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There once lived a 10 mwaka old girl named,Scarlett.
Her family lived in a Big,HUGE,Mansion.
S:Mom!!!PLEASE!!!!!!!
M:If I say Fine,will wewe stop?
S:YES!!!
M:Yes.
S:(Hugs mom)THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!WOO HO!!
Scarlett ran up to call her 3 friends,Nancy,Penny,and Chloe.
S:(Calls)SHE alisema YES!!!
Then her brother,Ethan,Came in,holding a bag of chips.
E:SHUT UP,SCARLETT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
S:SHHHHUUUUTT UUUUPPP!!!
Then he stomped out.
M:Scarlett!I just remembered!I have to work tomorrow!
S:So?We're responsible,Mom!Besides,(mumbles)Ethan...is....(gulp,pretends to barf)Responsible.
M:Um...I don't know
S:Don't make me say it...AGAIN!
M:Fine!!But wewe have to help me with the groceries!
S:(Makes face)Fine!Last deal!
M:Come on!
--------------------------------------------------
TO BE CONTINUED!
My name is Skeeter,Skeeter Johnson.I live in Mississippi with my mother,Jenna,And my father,Chris.My dream is to be a author.Today I went to my Friend's house for her charity.Her name is,Maybelle.
March,17,1961,
Maybelle:Skeeter!!I'm so glad wewe made it!
Skeeter:Maybelle!I can't believe it!I haven't seen wewe in a month!
That moment I wondered what the maids were saying
Elie:I'm gonna have to kill that Maybelle!
Faith:I know how wewe feel,honey.
Elie:I never wanted this job,but I need money.
Skeeter:So girls,today I think I'm gonna try to get a job!
Joy:Oh?What kind of job do wewe want?
Skeeter:A author!...
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Sam is 7 years old,has brown hair,And is a girl,This Christmas,her school is doing something where kids can buy stuff for their families,For Christmas,"So what are wewe gonna get?"Sam's friend,Chloe,asked."I don't know,It's a week away though."Sam said."Well,I hope there will be earrings!My mom goes crazy over those!"Chloe said.
"Well,Bye Chloe!My rides here!See wewe tomorrow!"Sam alisema as she ran to her car."Hey Mom,Guess what?" "What?"Her mom asked."In a week,All the students are gonna be able to buy stuff for their families for Christmas!!"Sam excitedly told her mom."Really?
Isn't Santa gonna...
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(Continued!)
The inayofuata siku I went shopping to get stuff for my cousins!It was a big mall!As I walked to the Clothes Aisle,a familiar figure was looking at skirts."Kyha?What are wewe doing here!?"Jade asked.
"Oh!I'm always with wewe when something bad happens!"Kyha answered."Well nothing bad is gonna happen!"Jade protested.To her surprise,There was a BOOM!"DUCK!"Kyha said.Jade slammed to the floor,
there wasn't one shot,there was four!BOOM!BOOM!BOOM!
"IS EVERYONE OKAY?"The mall manager asked."YES!"Everyone answered."So why are wewe still here?And why are people looking at me like a wacko?"
Jade asked."Because,No...
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My Life:
I'm 18 years old,Blond hair,My name is Jade,my grandparents are dead(duh!!!)My dad was divorced!My mom really only cares about my baby brother,Matthew,and when I ask if she loves me...Well...This is what I get:
"Mom.Do wewe upendo me?" "That's nice dear,Hey can wewe bring me some Medicine??"Mom would ALWAYS answer LIKE THAT!Good thing I'm gonna celebrate krisimasi With my Cousin!So what if I didn't tell her!I'm still going!Already Booked a plane!Anyways!After the aftermath of My mom and her Head ache!I always went to my friend,Charlotte's apartment.Yeah!I did tonight,not much happening there.I...
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Teacher:Okay Suzi go to the map and find North America.
Suzi:Right here!
Teacher:Good job!Now Bobby,who discovered America?
Bobby:Suzi Did!
god I cracked up today!
------------------------------------------------
Speaking of today!My class gotta go to our 'BOOK BUDDIES' Class room and help make gingerbread houses!My book buddy's name was Addy,(mine is Abby!)Anyways!It was like...SPRINKLE CITY!!If wewe were an ant,You would drown in sprinkles!!!!!!!!!GOD
My friend ,Sam,Was inayofuata to me...and she had like 50 spaz attacks!She was super hyped up!!!!Wow!They really shouldn't Put Candy in front of her!And I just can't stand the sprinkles!!!!God!I almost devoured the icing!There was like M&Ms,Gummy Drops,
Candy Canes,Nerds(one girl was like' Oh my god i upendo these!),a lot zaidi too!Plus my friend Sam made a story called 'The Black Dragons' Kinda like The girl with the dragon tattoo!Listening to Taylor Swift's"Permanent marker"!Love it!

BYE GUTS AND GURLS!