bila mpangilio Club
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posted by ilovepenguins
i didn't write this

1 - Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

2 - If wewe had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be "meetings."

3 - There is a very fine line between "hobby" and "mental illness."

4 - People who want to share their religious maoni with wewe almost never want wewe to share yours with them.

5 - wewe should not confuse your career with your life.

6 - Nobody cares if wewe can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

7 - Never lick a steak, mnofu knife.

8 - The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.

9 - wewe will never find anybody who can give wewe a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.

10 - wewe should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that wewe think she's pregnant unless wewe can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.

11 - There comes a time when wewe should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

12 - The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status au ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

13 - A person who is nice to wewe but rude to a waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)

14 - Your Marafiki upendo wewe anyway.

15 - Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

16 - Thought for the day: Men are like fine wine. They start out as grapes, and it's up to the women to stomp the c*** (not the best) out of them until they turn into something acceptable to have chajio, chakula cha jioni with.

17 - A husband will never get the last word in an argument, due to the fact that anything he says is actually the start of an entirely new argument!

18 - Phrases to live kwa "Please, Thank you, and YES DEAR!"

19 - I believe in equality and women's lib......but instead of changing postman to post person, how about tackling........menstruation, mental illness, menopause, etc......it seems to me that we are picking only the nice ones to change!
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posted by spongefan612
 A detailed smiley face
A detailed smiley face
Here are some things I want to talk about. It's sort of like a diary, but one that people can read because other people may have gone through these things too. I may sware, but that is because I'm trying to make a F***ing point.

First of all, I'm overweight and whatever I do it looks stupid because I'm fat. I mean, when I'm happy, I expect that I look like an idiot in whatever motions I make. My life is a Youtube Poop with 100,000,000, views. It's annoying to think that I can never look cool when doing something. Also, it seems like these days EVERY girl I see is skinny (not anorexic) but skinny...
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posted by Feathershine
1. Call 911 and say someone got hit kwa a car, then tell the a bila mpangilio address
2. Write a short story on a magical wizard named Harry
3. Get some eggs, open a window and throw them at people walking by
4. Go to your neighbors house, knock on the door, and wait till they open it. When they open it start crying and say "I'm sorry for your loss"
5. Run up to bila mpangilio people and give them a hug
6. Jump, and try to catch the clouds
7. Roam around the neighborhood and direct cars
8. Run in circles and if someone asks wewe what your doing say "I'm running about! What are wewe doing?!"
9. Go through your chakula and...
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bila mpangilio Things That ARE True

1) fanpop is fun!

2)My brothers are the sons of the devil

3) Gerbils can be scary.

4) My cat is orange

5) My other cat is black

6) I've eaten a purple taco before. Not chakula colored..

7) Mr. Warburton is my uncle (He created Codename: Kids inayofuata Door)

8) I live in Phoenix, Arizona where it's very hot.

9) I like GoldFish.

10) I'm bored.........

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>You...
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posted by jessicamc26
juu BUMPER STICKER'S SEEN AROUND THE WORLD1. Constipated People Don't Give A Shit.2. Practice salama Sex, Go Screw Yourself.3. If wewe Drink Don't Park, Accidents Cause People.4. Who Lit The Fuse On Your Tampon?5. If wewe Don't Believe In Oral Sex, Keep Your Mouth Shut.6. Please Tell Your Pants Its Not Polite To Point.7. If That Phone Was Up Your Butt, Maybe wewe Could Drive A Little Better.8. My Kid Got Your Honor Roll Student Pregnant.9. Thank wewe For Pot Smoking.10. To All wewe Virgins: Thanks For Nothing.11. If At First wewe Don't Succeed...
blame Someone Else And Seek Counseling.12. Impotence:...
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posted by nessienjake
Too Much Water?
Is it true that drinking too much water can kill you?


Yes, but not easily. It may be hard to believe, but wewe can actually die from water intoxication. How much water do wewe need to drink to overdose on it? Well, it's not the amount so much as what you're doing and how fast wewe drink it. Most at risk are athletes who drink large amounts of water as they complete marathons au other extreme sporting events. Most endurance athletes need anywhere from eight to sixteen ounces per hour, but too much zaidi than that can be dangerous, causing seizures and death. What happens is the large...
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posted by 16falloutboy
Ok, I've read an makala where a female teacher raped her male student, who was a teenager, he was 16 I believe? But anyway, and many maoni stated where, "Oh it's alright for a women to rape a man because he likes sex." and many other comments. When I saw these, I got really pissed. Women are treated badly in life and they're being treated like they can't do anything wrong. Gender doesn't matter, rape is rape. I'm pretty sure a young man with no experience, wouldn't like a grown women raping them. The boy's mind would be traumatized...why do people think a women can do what she wants? So...
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posted by slenderman777
I Always liked the Mario creepypastas. they were good and might i add not that creepy....that all changed when.... i had the dream...so i went to kitanda i woke up and first thing. everyone was dead. my brothers. my sisters. my parents. Marafiki .random other people all dead. then out of no where Mario came out of nowhere. he started to say something. he said."survive my deadly maze and wewe will live but fail and wewe will die" i then was in a maze. walking what seemed like hours of no point of ending.at this point i was scared out of my mine.just then Mario Came at me and alisema "you failed my maze therefore wewe must be dead" it was at this point i woke up Screaming. i was back in the real world. the end