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As a proud visitor of forty-four of the fifty United States, I am a bit of a self-taught expert in amusing oneself on long rides in motor vehicles. Whether wewe are the driver, riding shotgun, au sitting in the back, there is a plethora of ways to make alisema drive go kwa much faster.
One way to take a long, boring drive across the never changing flatness of Nebraska au Oklahoma, and mold it into an enjoyable spending of one’s time is to engage in a physical fight with a sibling. This works best when wewe are driving and the sibling is in the back seat. It does not matter if the alisema sibling is behind wewe au the passenger, the fight (and the reactions of the others in the car) will certainly make the drive zaidi interesting. However, this is not the only thing wewe can do to amuse yourself while behind the wheel. Something I have personally found amusing is to occasionally nick the rumble strip, possibly to the beat of the song playing on the radio. If no song is playing, drive on the strip itself, bobbing your head as if the sound is pleasant. Another thing wewe can try, if wewe are passing a car on a two lane road, is stay in the lane with opposing traffic as long as possible, shouting “chicken!” If wewe stop for gas, pull up to a pampu that is on the opposite side of the gas cap. When it is time to switch drivers, point all the mirrors straight down before surrendering your kiti, kiti cha to the probably relieved replacement.

There is a reason why everyone wants to ride shotgun, and many don’t realize what it truly is, like I do. When in the passenger kiti, kiti cha wewe have control over the volume and temperature in the car. Adjust both as often as wewe like, based on the genre of the muziki au the popularity of the song in the minds of the others in the car. If wewe find yourself driving alongside a river, au on a bridge (and wewe have faith in your swimming and emergency vehicle evacuation abilities) wait until a treacherous point and gasp loudly. When going down a kilima of any kind (and this works if wewe are driving, as well, kwa the way) raise your arms in the air and scream like wewe are at a theme park.

If wewe are confined to the back kiti, kiti cha (and when on a long drive try to be at the wheel first, since after your backseat au shotgun antics wewe may never gain that opportunity since the others in the car don’t know how to have fun) there are still many things wewe can do to pass the time. One of my vipendwa is to kick the person who is sitting in front of you. I know from experience that it really ticks them off, and they will be sure to tell wewe this, probably in slightly less school-appropriate language. Yet another tactic is to reach around to the front and unbuckle the driver and passenger’s seatbelts. If wewe cannot reach them, look to see if the check engine light is on. If it is, announce this every ten seconds. If it is not, and wewe cannot reach the seatbelts, put on headphones and listen to muziki au a movie, and laugh hysterically every once in a while. If wewe can snort, do so. Look as if wewe cannot understand any dirty looks the others give you. If they voice their opinions, suggest that they lock wewe in the shina so wewe can kick out the taillights and wave to other cars. (Don’t explain that part, however!)

There are many, many ways to have fun on a long car ride. Believe me: it really helps keep the time from dragging on. Many of these ways are undiscovered, so as well as the presented ideas, have fun making up time passers of your own.
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