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I found this hilarious makala on pcworld.com
Don't know who the mwandishi is, but he's funny.

1. Backward Thinking
"I sold my only car to help pay for gas money, but now gas has come down in price. How do I get my car back?"
I tried to contact this guy, but it turns out that he also sold his computer to help pay for his Internet connection.

2. It's nyara Lock--Capisce?
"HOW DO I TURN OFF CAPSLOCK? I ACCIDENTALLY TURNED IT ON YESTERDAY AND I DONT KNOW HOW TO TURN IT BACK OFF."
Note to self: Register howtoturnoffcapslock.com; make millions.

3. Credit Crunch
"I wanted to see if my computer would read my...
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posted by Sheetal1256
Here are some funny New Year's resolutions for 2012...
I will think of a nenosiri other than "password" au "hello".

I will not tell the same story at every get together.

I won't worry so much.

I will cut my hair.

I will grow my hair.

I will stop considering other people's feelings when they so obviously don't consider mine - if that unwashed fellow sits inayofuata to me again, I'll tell him he stinks!

I will be zaidi imaginative.

I will not bore my boss kwa with the same excuse for taking leaves. I will think of some zaidi excuses.

I will do less laundry and use zaidi deodorant.

I will avoid taking a bath whenever...
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added by Juilet1234
posted by Usui--takumi
Why was Tigger looking in the bowl??
He was trying to find pooh.
There were three men on an airplane, one of them decides to bring a baby.There is a crash and only three parachutes so they leave the baby behind. When they get to the bottom they hear screaming. They find the baby on the ground. The dad of the baby says, '' How did wewe get down here? ''. The baby replies, '' Me not dumb, me not silly, me hold on to daddy's willy!''
What's black and white, black and white, black and white?
A penguin, auk rolling down a hill.
Yo momma so fat, when she jumps her own boobs slap her.
Yo momma so dumb AND fat,...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
Welcome to The Weakest Link.

Here is a very simple little test comprised of four maswali to determine the level of your intellect. Your majibu must be spontaneous and immediate, with no deliberating au wasting time.

And NO CHEATING. On your mark, set....GO!!!

1: wewe are competing in a race, and overtake the runner in sekunde place.
In which position are wewe now?

Answer:

If wewe answered that you're now coming first then you're completely wrong. wewe overtook the sekunde runner and took their place, therefore you're coming second.

For the inayofuata swali try not to be so dumb.

2 : If wewe overtake the last...
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posted by Shelly_McShelly
a boy was asked kwa his teacher to pick some spelling words for his homework. the boy goes nyumbani and asks his mum "what's a good spelling word?" and the mother majibu " Shutup, i'm busy", so he writes it down.
he goes to his dad and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and the dad majibu "da na na na Batman!" so he writes it down.
next he goes to his older sister and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and she majibu "yeah yeah" so the boy writes it down.
he goes to his younger sister and asks "whats a good spelling word?" and she majibu "lollipop, lollipop" so he writes it down.
Finally he goes...
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posted by invadercalliope
•Everyone in this place is unhappy. And since they're unhappy, they're probably looking for someone worse off than they are.
•You know who isn't human? wewe know who isn't human?! PEOPLE LIKE YOU!
•Up to this day, I've never killed a single human.
•You will never see me again.
•I was going to let wewe go; after all, there aren't many of us out there, but you're just such a pain in the ass.
•Please forget about everything.
•Are wewe enjoying this?
Kouta: "I thought we were friends."

Lucy: "We are friends, that's why you're still alive."

Kouta: "You killed my father, Kanae.. and my sister Kanae... For that I will never forgive you."
Lucy: "All this time, I've lived in hope of telling wewe how sorry I am, I've fought armies, just to have this chance, but now, there's nothing I can say that's good enough."

Kurama: "Regret is the domain of those who have earned the right to look back on the past. All I have is shame."
The End
Okay so if wewe live on the eastcoast u are probably getting used to the snow..........so even if u aren't, everybody has the problem of having nothing to do when it snows but sled. So these are a few of the things that i enjoy to do.........hehe!

1. Fill balloons with water. Then leave them outside overnight.............yeah i'm this stupid. The inayofuata day, cut the balloons off and wewe got.........AN ICE BALL!! (i usually make like 15) Then use them to pay dodgeball. This is especially fun to do in deep snow, when wewe can barely songesha as it is. Technically, u could use them to do various things,...
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THIS IS NOT MINE. I got it from Tumblr. x)

The following is an actual swali aliyopewa on a chuo kikuu, chuo kikuu cha of Washington Chemistry mid-term:

The answer kwa one student was so ‘profound’ that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) au endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) au some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First,...
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