That inayofuata morning at 5 AM...
Chris: ALL CONTESTANTS MUST BE DRESSED AND AT THE muziki THEATER DOWN THE beach, pwani IN T-MINUS THIRTY MINUTES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Everyone: *groans*
(After everybody is awake and at the theater)
Chris: OK, today's challenge is a talent contest.
Veronica: OOOH! YAY!!!
Britt and Jacki: *laugh*
Chris: Uh, anyway, seeing as there are 11 of you, I decided to spice things up. And seeing as how this is a muziki challenge, please welcome, from the past three seasons - Trent!
Trent: hujambo everyone!
Duncan: Ah, it's little Pretty Boy.
Trent: Shut it, Duncan.
Courtney: FINALLY, we're on the same page!
Duncan: OK, first of all Courtney, back off, I already have a girlfriend. Actually, I have two.
Courtney: Oh? Is she blind au dumb au deaf?
Trent and Veronica: *rofl*
Duncan: Nope. *grabs Brittani's arm* It's her.
Courtney: O.O You're dating....my COUSIN?
Duncan: COUSIN!? *releases Britt's arm*
Britt: *blushes* Yes.
Chris: Uh, ok, can we get back to ME now?!
Duncan: Why didn't ya tell me wewe two are cousins?!
Courtney/Brittani: Idk.
Chris: Anyway, Trent. Dude. No teams.
Trent: Right on.
Chris: OK, today's challenge, as i alisema before, is a talent contest. The 12 contestants will be divided girls versus guys. The objective today will be to pick the people out of your auditioners who will be best to represent your team in the show. The team that wins will earn invincibility and will be sending someone from the opposing gender home.
Britt: *rolls eyes* Whatever.
- - - - - - - - - -
At the girls' auditions...
Courtney and Brittani: *singing Replay to themselves and playing with each other's hair*
Veronica: OK, since everybody else is pretty much a race of losers, I'm nominating myself Captain.
Jacki: Who says?
Veronica: Says me.
Jacki: *rolls eyes* Whatever.
Veronica: OK, going in alphabetical order, first is....Rian.
Britt: How is that alphabetical order?
Veronica: I'm going from Z to A.
Britt: OK.
Veronica: Rian! You're up.
Rian: Huh? Oh, I'm not auditioning.
Veronica: Uh, ok, um...Jennavive?
Jennavive: Ok.
Veronica: And you're doing....?
Jennavive: Singing.
Veronica: What will wewe be imba for us?
Jennavive: Cowboy Casanova kwa Carrie Underwood.
Britt: *gasps*
: : : : : : : CONFESSIONALS : : : : : : :
Britt: Jennavive aliiba my audition song! That's the only song I can sing without trying to remember the words!!
Jennavive: I don't care that I took Britt's chances. I was really close to going nyumbani last time. I'm not letting that happen again.
: : : : : : : END OF CONFESSIONALS : : : : : : :
Jennavive: *singing*
You better take it from me
That boy is like a disease
wewe run and wewe try and wewe trying to hide and you're wondering why
wewe can't get free
: : : : : : : CONFESSIONALS : : : : : : :
Britt: Just during that first verse, I knew I'd have a chance. Jenna can't sing worth sh*t!!!
: : : : : : : END OF CONFESSIONALS : : : : : : :
Veronica: Uh, thank you, Jenna. inayofuata is...Jacki.
Jacki: *sits at a kinanda propped on the stage*
Veronica: What are wewe doing?
Jacki: Singing. Now shut it, wewe fucktard.
Veronica: Uh...ok. imba what?
Jacki: You'll see. *clears throat and starts singing*
All of my hate cannot be bound
I will not be drowned kwa your thoughtless scheming
Now, wewe can try and tear me down
Beat me to the ground I will see wewe screaming...
Thumbing through the pages of my fantasies
Pushing all the mercy down, down, down
I wanna see wewe try and take a swing at me
C'mon, gonna put wewe on the ground, ground, ground
Veronica: Um...thank you.
Jacki: Ha! S-S-S-Suck it, bitch.
Britt: *laughs*
Chris: ALL CONTESTANTS MUST BE DRESSED AND AT THE muziki THEATER DOWN THE beach, pwani IN T-MINUS THIRTY MINUTES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Everyone: *groans*
(After everybody is awake and at the theater)
Chris: OK, today's challenge is a talent contest.
Veronica: OOOH! YAY!!!
Britt and Jacki: *laugh*
Chris: Uh, anyway, seeing as there are 11 of you, I decided to spice things up. And seeing as how this is a muziki challenge, please welcome, from the past three seasons - Trent!
Trent: hujambo everyone!
Duncan: Ah, it's little Pretty Boy.
Trent: Shut it, Duncan.
Courtney: FINALLY, we're on the same page!
Duncan: OK, first of all Courtney, back off, I already have a girlfriend. Actually, I have two.
Courtney: Oh? Is she blind au dumb au deaf?
Trent and Veronica: *rofl*
Duncan: Nope. *grabs Brittani's arm* It's her.
Courtney: O.O You're dating....my COUSIN?
Duncan: COUSIN!? *releases Britt's arm*
Britt: *blushes* Yes.
Chris: Uh, ok, can we get back to ME now?!
Duncan: Why didn't ya tell me wewe two are cousins?!
Courtney/Brittani: Idk.
Chris: Anyway, Trent. Dude. No teams.
Trent: Right on.
Chris: OK, today's challenge, as i alisema before, is a talent contest. The 12 contestants will be divided girls versus guys. The objective today will be to pick the people out of your auditioners who will be best to represent your team in the show. The team that wins will earn invincibility and will be sending someone from the opposing gender home.
Britt: *rolls eyes* Whatever.
- - - - - - - - - -
At the girls' auditions...
Courtney and Brittani: *singing Replay to themselves and playing with each other's hair*
Veronica: OK, since everybody else is pretty much a race of losers, I'm nominating myself Captain.
Jacki: Who says?
Veronica: Says me.
Jacki: *rolls eyes* Whatever.
Veronica: OK, going in alphabetical order, first is....Rian.
Britt: How is that alphabetical order?
Veronica: I'm going from Z to A.
Britt: OK.
Veronica: Rian! You're up.
Rian: Huh? Oh, I'm not auditioning.
Veronica: Uh, ok, um...Jennavive?
Jennavive: Ok.
Veronica: And you're doing....?
Jennavive: Singing.
Veronica: What will wewe be imba for us?
Jennavive: Cowboy Casanova kwa Carrie Underwood.
Britt: *gasps*
: : : : : : : CONFESSIONALS : : : : : : :
Britt: Jennavive aliiba my audition song! That's the only song I can sing without trying to remember the words!!
Jennavive: I don't care that I took Britt's chances. I was really close to going nyumbani last time. I'm not letting that happen again.
: : : : : : : END OF CONFESSIONALS : : : : : : :
Jennavive: *singing*
You better take it from me
That boy is like a disease
wewe run and wewe try and wewe trying to hide and you're wondering why
wewe can't get free
: : : : : : : CONFESSIONALS : : : : : : :
Britt: Just during that first verse, I knew I'd have a chance. Jenna can't sing worth sh*t!!!
: : : : : : : END OF CONFESSIONALS : : : : : : :
Veronica: Uh, thank you, Jenna. inayofuata is...Jacki.
Jacki: *sits at a kinanda propped on the stage*
Veronica: What are wewe doing?
Jacki: Singing. Now shut it, wewe fucktard.
Veronica: Uh...ok. imba what?
Jacki: You'll see. *clears throat and starts singing*
All of my hate cannot be bound
I will not be drowned kwa your thoughtless scheming
Now, wewe can try and tear me down
Beat me to the ground I will see wewe screaming...
Thumbing through the pages of my fantasies
Pushing all the mercy down, down, down
I wanna see wewe try and take a swing at me
C'mon, gonna put wewe on the ground, ground, ground
Veronica: Um...thank you.
Jacki: Ha! S-S-S-Suck it, bitch.
Britt: *laughs*
As wewe may of have guessed kwa the title, wewe can already tell how much i hate Total Drama All Stars.
1. Do i even need to explain? This season is anything but worthy of being called a season!
2. Lightning is still the same as he was in season 4: putting sha in every sentence and still dumb as a rock
3. How is Sam even remotely considered an all star? Seriously! Wouldn't someone like Brick be a better choice? I'm not disputing Christian Potenza's choices for who he picked to be in season 5, but still, wouldn't Brick of have been a better option?
4. The cast in general is disappointing. I know i'm going to get a lot hate for this, but hear me out. This is the reason that this season did not meet any of my exceptations.
5. Not only has nothing changed about Lightning, but the same can be alisema for Scott. What i mean is his fear of Fang remains unchanged.
That concludes part 1. Stay tuned for part 2.
1. Do i even need to explain? This season is anything but worthy of being called a season!
2. Lightning is still the same as he was in season 4: putting sha in every sentence and still dumb as a rock
3. How is Sam even remotely considered an all star? Seriously! Wouldn't someone like Brick be a better choice? I'm not disputing Christian Potenza's choices for who he picked to be in season 5, but still, wouldn't Brick of have been a better option?
4. The cast in general is disappointing. I know i'm going to get a lot hate for this, but hear me out. This is the reason that this season did not meet any of my exceptations.
5. Not only has nothing changed about Lightning, but the same can be alisema for Scott. What i mean is his fear of Fang remains unchanged.
That concludes part 1. Stay tuned for part 2.