bila mpangilio Club
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What women should tell men...but don't

1. The reason why our bras don't always match our underwear is because WE actually change our underwear.

2. The inayofuata time wewe and your buddies make jokes about armed women in combat, take a kura ya maoni to see which of wewe successfully aim at the toilet rim.

3. If we're watching football with wewe - it's not bonding - it's their butts.

4. Whenever possible, please try to say whatever wewe have to say after the movie.

5. Lay off the beans several hours before bedtime.

6. Please don't drive when you're not driving.

7. If wewe were really looking for an honest answer, wewe wouldn't ask in bed.

8. The inayofuata time wewe make jokes about female drivers, research the number of accidents caused kwa rubber-necking mini-skirts.

9. If only women gossip, how do wewe and your Marafiki keep track of 'who's easy'?

10. Stop telling us most male strippers are gay: we don't care.

11. When you're not around, I belch loudly, too.

12. We don't mind if wewe look in the mirror to check your appearance - in fact, please do!

13. When you're out with us, please wear 'our' inayopendelewa outfit rather than 'yours' - the torn jeans and dirty T-Shirt will last longer that way.

14. If wewe must grunt in reply, please develop a system to indicate a positive vs. A negative grunt.

15. Don't insist that we 'get off the stupid phone' and then not talk to us.

16. Eye contact is best established above our shoulder-level.

17. Cleaning the house is not necessarily 'women's work'; besides, most of the 'dirt' and clutter is yours anyway.

18. Yes, we know most of the great chefs are men, why is it then wewe never want to cook?

19. We go to the Ladies Room in groups to talk about you.

20. Yes, we know wewe can probably beat us arm wrestling' however, very few raises au promotions were gained kwa arm wrestling the boss.
If wewe don't read this, someone else wil
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posted by invadercalliope
CCAALLIIOOPPEE
CCHHAANNEELL!
HIA EVERYBODY!
I'm your host InvaderCalliope!
Well i'm going to sing! *sings*
WELL AS wewe KNOW I GET TONS AND TONS OF shabiki LETTERS! NOW I WILL READ ONE TO YOU!
The Letter reads:Big hello to InvaderCalliope on this onyesha i allways see a new guest nyota so i was wondering how do wewe do it?
wewe WANNA KNOW BECAUSE ITS AN HONOR TO BE ON THIS onyesha BEING ON THIS onyesha AS ME AS THE HOST!
Well todays guest nyota is..............KEEF!
Keef:HI EVERYONE I HOPE ZIM AND DIB ARE WATCHING THERE MY BEST FRIENDS!
InvaderCalliope:You know your Marafiki are going to think your pathetic.
Keef:WHAT!
InvaderCalliope:You herd me if wewe make them know your there whole world there going to use you!
OH NO WERE OUTTA TIME!
WELL BYE!
BUT FIRST PLZ ENJOY TODAYS SPECAIL PICTURE!
BYE ME!
*music*
Nazonazo mitai ni
chikyuugi wo tokiakashitara
Minna de doko made mo ikeru ne
*music*
Wakuwaku shitai to negainagara sugoshiteta yo
Kanaetekureta no wa dare nano?
Jikan no hate made boooon!!
Wa-pu de ru-pu
na kono omoi wa
Nani mo kamo wo makikonda souzou de asobou
Aru hareta hi no koto
Mahou ijou no yukai
ga
Kagirinaku furisosogu fukanou janai wa
*music*
Ashita mata au toki warai nagara hamingu
Ureshisa wo atsumeyou
Kantan nanda yo
konna no
Oikakete ne tsukamaete mite
Ooki na yume
yume suki deshou?
*music*
Iroiro yosou ga
dekisou de dekinai
mirai
Some demo hitotsu
dake wakaru yo
*music*
Kirakira hikatte atsui
kumo...
continue reading...
posted by TDItwin
here is something funny to try get 2 of your freinds together and put on this bila mpangilio ninger play (sorry if i offend wewe i herd this some were and its been in my mind for a mwezi so i thought td post it here)

sioki:saska saska are wewe in there this is your consious speaking ...moo..live with it!

saska:sorry being an emo makes it hard to concentrat on ninger traing

sapa:i know what wewe mean every bodys always telling me to...

sioki:SHUT UP sapa we all have arational hate for wewe !!

sapa:what i havent done enything yet??

sioki:we still hate wewe !!

sapa: dose saska hate me too?

sioki:no hes an emo he has no emotins except for the one that is emo ...GOD WHY DO wewe EXSIST?!?!

sapa:what the i havent done enything to deserve this kind of treatment

sioki:STOP EXISTING!!

saska:*starts beatboxing*

saps+sioki:*join in*
this gose on for 5 sekunde till wewe all cry total ninger theme song
 look at them
look at them
posted by black_magics
1.The 'poke' button on Facebook is awesome...
But I think there should be a 'stab' button...

2.was riding a horse yesterday and fell off. I almost got killed! THANK GOODNESS
the Walmart greeter saw what happened and came over and unplugged it.

3. anyone who says "nothing is impossible" has obviously never
tried to staple jello to a tree.

4.Text someone and tell them "Hey, I Lost my phone, can wewe call it?"
and see how many people call it

5. 3 bottles of bleach: $15.00. One rope, 3 rolls of duct tape,
and a shovel: $35.00. 3 boxes of trash bags: $10.00. The look on the cashier's face: Priceless!...
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50 Fun things to do in a Grocery Store

1. Ask the produce manager if he happens to have any fresh Oompah Loompah fruit.

2. While holding a cantaloupe directly in front of your chest, squeeze it and smile dreamily.

3. Every time wewe turn the corner with your shopping cart, shout “Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!”

4. Go up to the manager and tell him au her that you’ve Lost your mommy.

5. While waiting in line at the checkout, juggle some lemons.

6. Tiptoe stealthily up and down the aisles – and around corners – with a magnifying glass.

7. While scratching frantically, ask the manager if he au she has anything...
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1.    Unplug the refrigerator.
2.    Turn the tanuri, joko on.
3.    Rearrange the furniture. (Turn a bedroom into a dining room, and vice versa.)
4.    Hide the remote.
5.    Hide the television.
6.    Hide the pets.
7.    Change the answering machine message.
8.    Turn off the answering machine.
9.    Change the speed dial numbers.
10.    Change the alarm clock time to twelve hours earlier.
11.    Add...
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NOTE: These "facts" have not necessarily been verified. They are just for fun.

1.If wewe keep a goldfish in a dark room, it will eventually turn white.

2.San Francisco cable cars are the only National Monuments that move.

3.Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England, but only in tropical samaki stores.

4.A Wisconsin forklift, kubebea operator for a Miller bia distributor was fired when a picture was published in a newspaper inaonyesha him drinking a Bud Light.

5.More people study English in China than speak it in the United States of America (300 million).

6.For every person on earth, there are an estimated...
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72 things Guys should know about Girls <3...


1. Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.

2. When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go.

3. When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her.

4. Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her wewe upendo her.

5. Call her before wewe sleep and after wewe wake up

6. Treat her like she's all that matters to you.

7. Tease her and let her tease wewe back.

8. Stay up all night with her when she's sick.

9. Watch her inayopendelewa movie with her au her inayopendelewa onyesha even if wewe think its stupid.

10. Give her the world.

11. Let her wear your clothes....
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1. Guys may be flirting around all siku but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.

2. When a guy really likes you, he'll disregard all your bad characteristics.

3. Guys go crazy over a girl's smile.

4. Guys will do anything just to get the girl's attention.

5. wewe have to tell a guy what wewe really want before he gets the message clearly.

6. Guys upendo their moms au grandmas.

7. A guy often thinks about the girl who likes him. But this doesn't mean that the guy likes her.

8. wewe can never understand him unless wewe listen to him.

9. Beware. Guys can make gossips...
continue reading...
added by emma-janee
added by deedeeflower
Source: panoramio.com