bila mpangilio Club
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posted by EllentheStrange
1.Go into the restroom,fall into the toilet and scream at the juu of your lungs TOILET RAPE!
2.Go to the toy section,find a large teddy kubeba and start frenching it.
3.Rip apart books,magizines,ect. wewe hate.
4.Ask a person if the have ever been toilet raped.
5.Speak pig latin,Russain,German,ect. to the employees.
6.Grap as many balls as wewe can and start thoughing them at people.If the get mad say wewe were trying to play dodge ball with them.
7.Bring a portable stero and play the loudest most annoying song ever.
8.Slap a bila mpangilio person in front of a bunch of people and say,"I can not beleive wewe cheated on me with that whore" and point to a bila mpangilio girl.
9.Try selling "chololate".
10.If wewe are alone in the restroom,take off your pad and leave it in the sink.
11.If wewe are alone and no one is coming to your aisle,take a wizz au dump there!
12.Scream ABUSE if someone hits,kicks,slaps ect. you.
13.Find fake blood and right on the walls scary sayings.
posted by karpach_13
Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a solar powered calculator?
A: The blonde works in the dark!

Q: How can wewe tell if a blonde has been using the computer?
A: The joystick, kifimbocheza is wet.

Q: What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her zaidi attractive?
A: Her ankles.

Q: What do wewe say to a Blonde that won't give in?
A: "Have another beer."

Q: What do Blondes say after sex?
A1: Thanks Guys.
A2: Are wewe boys all in the same band?
A3: Do wewe guys all play for the Green bay Packers?

Q: How do wewe make a blonde's eyes twinkle?
A: Shine a flashlight in their ear.

Q: What does a screen door and a blonde...
continue reading...
posted by MileySelena982
1. We only cry infront of wewe when we
a) want wewe to comfort us, or
b) can't help it

2. We only wear mini skirt, upindo when we are single,
not because we do it for you. But not all of us.

3. When we talk about how "hot" guys are, we don't mean it.
Personality is all we care about. But a hot guy's a plus

4. If wewe ask us what's wrong and we don't reply... DON'T
ASK AGAIN. We don't au feel like wewe should know, so
forget about it.

5. When we say we're mad, upset, au angery, belive us.
Because we MEAN it.

6. Do not, I repeat. Do not EVER make our FATHERS
MAD. Just don't go there, okay?

7. If wewe think we like to hang out with wewe every
waking minute, think twice.

8. Have wewe ever thought that we only do the things
we do for you?

9. When wewe ask us out, and we say yes, our first date
better be AWESOME. If not, read number 6 again. <3

10. When we say we upendo you... wewe better believe it.
posted by orangeturnip
things that make you...


being ugly is a state of mind

think yourself ugly ... slowly wewe become ugly
having a lack of confindence...you soon become ugly
being obsesed with the way wewe look
being obsesed with being what "men/women" want
putting peaple down
being a bitch
worrying
saying ewwwww au not accepting peaples diffreces
all signs of ugliness...add up the signs how ugly have wewe become?


im ugly how do i change....

be natral and true
one bila mpangilio act of kindness everyday

look at someone for who they are not what they look like - everyones idea of beauty is diffrent yet we are subliminialy told its the same

look for your truth not the worlds

upendo yourself
upendo the world
spread some joy

upendo peace ..... not fighting

stand tall and proud and confident in who wewe are.
dont let the world change you

thank wewe for taking the time to read ... this came from my moyo and i hope it will help someone out there <3 <3
haha I loved it...^.^ no offense to any blonde people around fanpop and around the world :D


Blonde Joke
the funniest blonde joke

I knew a blonde that was so stupid that.......

* she called me to get my phone number.

* she spent 20 dakika looking at the machungwa, chungwa juisi box because it alisema "concentrate."

* she put lipstick on her forehead because she wanted to make up her mind.

*she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order.

*she sent me a fax with a stamp on it.

*she tried to drown a fish.

*she thought a quarterback was a refund.

*she got locked in a grocery store and starved to death.

*she tripped over...
continue reading...
posted by nessienjake
I recieved and barua pepe with a orodha of bila mpangilio jokes I thought I'd share it with wewe guys :)


Lawyer Joke
10 Husbands, Still a Virgin

A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.

On their wedding night, she told her new husband, "Please be gentle, I'm still a virgin."

"What?" alisema the puzzled groom.

"How can that be if you've been married ten times?"

"Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative: he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

Husband #2 was in software services: he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he alisema he'd look into it and get...
continue reading...
posted by Shelly_McShelly
Colonel Sanders
There's no reason to be the richest man in the cemetery. wewe can't do any business from there.

Roseanne Barr
Experts say wewe should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time? When you're feeling festive?

W.C. Fields
I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

Milton Berle
They've finally come up with the perfect office computer. If it makes a mistake, it blames another computer.

George Gobal
If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching televisheni kwa candlelight.

Groucho Marx
I find televisheni very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the...
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Guy's point of view

(Here's the take on relationships from a guy's POV. NOT MINE)
From a guys point of view:

We don't care if wewe talk to other guys.

We don't care if you're Marafiki with other guys.

But when you're sitting inayofuata to us, and some bila mpangilio guy walks into the room
 and wewe jump up and tackle him without even introducing us, yeah.

It doesn't help if wewe sit there and talk to him for ten dakika without
even acknowledging the fact that we're still there.

We don't care if a guy calls you, but at 2 in the morning we do get a
 little concerned.

Nothing is that important at 2 a.m. that it...
continue reading...
So there has been a lot of new horror sinema coming out and a lot of people doing dumb stuff in that movie.

So I'm gonna help wewe survive. you're welcome.

1. Don't take a trip to a secluded area.
-You could go to Vegas, New York, Paris so why the hell go into a damn desert.

2.Don't invite your boyfriend and the local village slut on the same trip. And don't get mad when they have sex.
-You knew she was a slut so don't get mad when it goes down

3.Don't run out of your hiding spot if the killer can't see you.
-He can't see you! He doesn't know where wewe are! Stay there and shut the hell up.

4.Don't...
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it's totally RANDOM...
**shale we start :P

1. Where were wewe 3 hours ago?
2. Who are wewe in upendo with?
3. Have wewe ever eaten a crayon?
4. Is there anything pink within 10 feet of you?
5. When is the last time wewe went to the mall?
6. Are wewe wearing socks right now?
7. Do wewe have a car worth over $2,000?
8. When was the last time wewe drove out of town?
9. Have wewe been to the sinema in the last 5 days?
10. Are wewe hot?
11. What was the last thing wewe had to drink?
12. What are wewe wearing right now?
13. Do wewe wash your car au let the car wash do it?
14. Last chakula that wewe ate?
15. Where were wewe last week...
continue reading...
added by Aqua_Rose
This is a fun song to help remember basic mduara, duara formulae and terminolgy. I warn you, it's catchy!
video
mduara, duara
maths
added by BlindBandit92
video
bila mpangilio
muziki
epic
damone
added by azkaban
MGMT
video
bila mpangilio
muziki
added by someone_save_me
A kinda stupid song XD I upendo to listen to it because it lacks any real purpose.
video
bila mpangilio
muziki
weird
FrancoDean@YT
video
bila mpangilio
funny
hilarious
weird
muziki
stewie's reaction is funny XD
video
stewies
reaction
to
2
girls
1
cup
added by australia-101
added by tanyya
added by applejackrocks
added by koalagirl9
Source: i dont know